I'll be home for Christmas

It's really over.

Over the last three days I have hugged, cried, and waved as I watched my dear friends drive away. It's hard, being the last to leave. I'm not going to lie, it's a lonely place tonight on this empty campus. I'm all packed up, ready to head out tomorrow afternoon, ready to start the next step.

The last week here was packed with such amazingly awesome times. We stayed up late, played games, chatted about anything and everything, went out to eat, played broomball (still sore, but SO worth it), and just ENJOYED each other. I also finished my work here, well obviously the book will be a continuing project but we are as complete as we can be on our draft, waiting to hear back from the editors now. It felt so bizarre to finish up everything. So fulfilling, yet it left me feeling all jittery and odd. I was rather hyper and giddy as well. As you can probably guess, it made for an exciting evening.  :)

And so now, I sit in my lonely, empty house. Looking around as memories flash by me. I hear echoes of laughter, can still feel the hugs of my friends, and see glimpses of their twinkling eyes. How I will miss living here and being a part of their lives in this way.

I still can't get over how I blessed I am. As I was packing I came across a picture of me from my very first day in Jackson Hole. I stared down at the girl in the photo, looked into her uncertain eyes and asked, "Would you ever have guessed? Could you ever imagine God would have given us this amazing year and a half?" I remember clearly that girl, I know her well, she's still very much a part of me but, well she's also practically a stranger. God has grown me so much over the last 18 months. I have experienced so much, learned so much, and I pray matured and grown wiser through it all. I have never before had such a great trust in God and His plan, a dependance on His faithfulness. Truly, even though I am uncertain about my future, I am sure that He is in control and so I rejoice at the uncertainty, for through it, God will prove faithful yet again.

And so Canada, watch out. I'm coming home.

Off the beaten path

I hear it's good to pave your own way,
to be original, to break the mold.
Apparently it's not admirable to just follow the trends,
stick to the easy road.
SO I decided to try it,
to push aside my inhibitions,
to venture beyond my comfort zone,
to branch out.
I stepped off the beaten path...

into a foot of snow
which quickly spilled over into my shoes
wet my socks and froze my ankles.
I almost fell over, gave a slight cry of shock
and scarcely missed jabbing my eye out on a tree branch...

as I scrambled back to the safe route.

And so I've decided to wear boots next time I go on an inspirational jaunt.

ten days

Ten days. I will be home in ten days.

I don't know if these tears that well up in my eyes come from joy and anticipation or if perhaps they testify to the ache in my heart when I think of leaving this place, these people, this task I have been blessed with. The past almost 18 months spent in Wyoming have impacted my life in so many ways and I hate to leave it. The last 5 1/2 months I have spent working on this book, serving at the school, have been such an incredible blessing. What a joy it has been to serve my Lord in this place. I have enjoyed each and every day with its specific trials and delights. I admit that I walk into this next chapter of life with much apprehension about my purpose. I never want to stop serving God, glorifying Him with all that I am and do and that's been so easy here. I know that I can do that wherever I am but as of yet, it's just not clear to me what I need to be doing upon my return. That's nerve-wracking to me, but really it's just another opportunity to trust my Father and His plans.

"And those who know Your name will put their trust in You,
For You, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek You." (Psalm 9:10)

And so in these last ten days, the final pages of this amazing chapter God has written in my life, I will continue to serve, to love, to find joy in each moment, praising Him for this gift. I will let myself cry but I will not dwell in unhappiness. I will let my heart ache but with joy, storing up these memories as precious treasures. And I will look forward to the change, with a firm confidence in God's provision, with excitement for His plans for me, whatever they may be.

Ten days.